Updated: Oct 17, 2021
Rejection. Why is it so painful to admit? That the scars rooted deep within us from our trauma and the past words darted at us like arrows are still stuck to us like glue. Yet, as hard as it is to admit, it becomes way too evident in our walk with Christ. Rejection keeps us imprisoned by the same fears and cycles that makes it very difficult for us to reach higher levels spiritually. However, with God all things are possible. Chains can be broken, and victory is won.
You see, life is a series of ups and downs. There will be seasons when you are on the top of the mountain, and seasons when you are in the valley peering up at the tough rocky obstacle that lies between you and God's promises. It is through faith that we trust God to see us through such obstacles in life, but it is through rejection that we are persuaded they are impossible to climb.
Trust me. I had my fair share of feeling rejected. Never feeling good enough. Even now in my relationship with God I still struggle to accept that God will never abandon me and that through seasons of resilient drought He is still faithful.
Let's be honest, sometimes the lies from the past feel more like truth when it is all you know. Sometimes the pain feels more comfortable than faith. It is a battle. Yes. But it is a battle always worth fighting.
The thing with rejection is when you let it consume you it takes over your true identity; the identity God gave you. You are not your past. You are a new creation in Christ for "the old has passed away and the new is here!". You are not your shame for you have been set free. In God we are made new. In God we are redeemed. In God we are loved more than we ever could imagine. So why is it so hard for us to accept that? Why is it so hard for us to receive God's love when it is the very type of love we all long for? Could it be that it is through our own rejection that we project images of the many people and/or circumstances that has let us down on God. The wonderful thing about God is He sees our brokenness and past baggage and He meets us where we are. The day you were saved was the beginning of your healing.
I remember the nights I cried as I wrestled against the lies I believed for so long. I didn't know I was insecure until I was secured in God. I didn't know I had some deep issues with rejection until I was accepted by God. God shown the light on the deep scars and burdens I carried with me for way too long. It was gut wrenching to see that I harbored so much internal pain and conflict for years. Rejection kept me from seeing God's best for my life. God saw much more in me than I could ever see in myself. He had all these plans and visions for my life yet, rejection made it so difficult to trust Him. I wondered time and time again:
What if it doesn't happen? Am I even worthy of that? Do things like that happen to people like me? Am I delusional?
So, I ran. I ran because I didn't want to be rejected again. Plus being rejected by God would be worse. I ran because of the pain that came with expecting rejection. I made an idol out of my pain. "A person with a broken past and childhood trauma, a person who can never be accepted, a person who is just not cut out for healthy relationships." I isolated myself. You see rejection always causes isolation. Isolation was never what God intended for us. He created us to support each other and bear each other's burdens. As the body of Christ, we were created to be one; not separate. However, though rejection has its own afflictions, God uses the rain showers to make us grow. What the enemy means for evil God always turns it to good.
I must admit I have not fully overcome my own battle with rejection, but I do know who I am in Christ. That means my identity is not in myself or in others. Instead, it is in God and because of that it is unchanging and absolute truth (God is not a man that He should lie). Even on days I feel the most rejected, I get to fully re-affirm God's truth over me.
The thing I realized most about this walk with Christ is there will always come a time where you will have to choose God's truth over what you feel. Sometimes God's truth may even seem like a lie or false hope on those days, but it is through living this truth out even when you do not feel like it that we give God the most glory, and show true and genuine faith.
So, if you are dealing with rejection just know you are not alone. There are others who are going through the same battle as well. And just so you know I took a look at the scoreboard, and it says that you are victorious in Christ! Keep your head up because the victory belongs to Jesus now, forever, and always.
Here are some tips to help you overcome rejection: 1. Identify the lies and thoughts you believe that are rooted in rejection and counteract them with scripture.
2. Seek deliverance from your past trauma by making amends with those who may have rejected you. Forgive anyone you still hold bitterness and/or resentment towards.
3. Invite God in. Go to Him for your healing. Spend time in His word daily to renew your mind and pray diligently for victory over rejection.
4. Do not let your pain define you. Instead seek growth and the lessons that you can take from your past painful experiences. I encourage you to write the painful experiences in your life down on a piece of paper and write the lessons you learned from them beside it. That way the next time the enemy tries to put you down you can be reminded of the good that came from the bad.
5. Be vigilant of your thoughts. Do not let a lie from the enemy go uncorrected by God's truth. Take all your thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ.
I wrote this blurb in a season of healing:
I rather get hurt again and again than have a heart as hard as stone. I rather cry than never cry again. I rather be broken than never experience what it's like to be whole. I rather grieve than never know what it's like to lose something you loved dearly. I rather fail than never try to win. I rather believe than doubt everything. I rather live than die with regret.
Scriptures to help you overcome rejection or the feeling of abandonment:
For my father and my mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in.
And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.
Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
1 Peter 2:4
As you come to him, a living stone rejected by men but in the sight of God chosen and precious, (Jesus was rejected too)
2 Corinthians 4:9
Persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed;
But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.
What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us?
“Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you.